Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Discipline

So with all the grounding going on around here, the concept of discipline or the lack thereof came to mind.  This is a very divisive subject.  Those that spank, those that don't.  The "time out" factor.  The shaving your kids head because he got suspended for a second time in the same school year.  Oh, that was me.  I actually had a co-worker tell me I what I did was exactly the same as torture.  Like real torture.  I explained that we told him the first time if he ever got suspended again, we would cut his hair, and he would have to wear what we told him to at school.  For my skater boy, the collared shirts, tucked in, with a belt fastened appropriately at his actual waist line, this was truly a horror.  But he never got suspended again.

So who's right?  Was it torture, or did he earn the judgement because he was forewarned.  My mother always said, forewarned is forearmed.  Basically, in her proper English, if I said I would do it, it will be done and you have the opportunity to avoid the consequences.  

I have to say I believe in discipline, but every kid is different.  Universally speaking, you cannot use the same thing on all kids.  Spanking can make some kids laugh.  Time out just means they will go read and you actually have to remind the kid they can come out.  So what do you use for discipline?  Are you one of the free spirits that let their child explore their environment with no consequences?  If you do, Why?  As much as you may question me for spanking my child, I definitely question you for not spanking your child.  Or rather, disciplining your child.  It does not have to be a swat on the butt.

Let's sort this all out.  But I will say, if you are on the side of no discipline, be prepared to back up your argument.  Because that is something I do not understand.  But enlighten me, please, maybe I am not exploring all my options.

I guess it comes down to this, I just want my kids to be accountable for their actions.  Because as they grow up, the world will hold them accountable.  

What do you think?  Let me know.

God bless you and yours.

2 comments:

Baby Z's Mom said...

In our house there is always a consequence to an action, be it good or bad. Sometimes it's a swat on the bum others it's a time out. No matter how small the infraction, there is always a calling out. Now it sounds like is it all bad, but it's not, we praise heavily too. It's all about balance and being consistent. If they are told hey, this will happen if you do this and they do it, by golly you better follow through. Kids figure out quickly that when Mama says no & means it or not. Believe me, when something like shaving a head happens, they will remember and behave accordingly. I still remember all my belongings in the middle of my room, dresser draws, jewelery boxes etc because I did not clean my room when asked repeatedly. Dad said do it, or you will find all your stuff in the middle of the room on the floor. After that I cleaned when asked. (now, not so much hee hee.)

Kay Klebba said...

How come I can totally see your dad doing that? I have another friend whose girls were fighting and their mom worked nights and was trying to sleep. Their father took everything out of every kitchen cabinet and told them to clean it all, dry it all and put it all back nicely. Nothing like four or five hours of manual labor to adjust your attitude.